P & M

It is a real challenge to stay in touch and up to date with everything on our plate in this season. But I figured it may be worth it to just keep a running “blog” with our thoughts and needs without any concern for how well it may be “presented” with well kempt newsletters and the like. I have pondered a lot in my heart since our time of training and the transition afterwards, for my peace, I need an outlet to untie all the burdens and even share the good faithfulness of the Lord with any and all who will listen. Please check back here in the “Updates” section for my such “natterings.” 

Just yesterday morning we have begun our journey “home” to California and it seems nothing short of miraculous that 1) all our stops along the way are undergoing unprecedented winter storms, but 2) each predicted shower of snow, sleet, and ice coincides with all of our “rest” days. God is too good to us. 

In my daily Bible reading I just read Numbers 13-15 where Moses sends 12 spies into the Promised Land. Ten return with a “bad” report of how it would be impossible to take the land because of the giants in the way, and the whole host of Israelites bemoan having ever left Egypt. Moses pleads intercession on their behalf to the Lord who passes fair judgment that “not one shall come into the land where I swore that I would make you dwell, except Caleb... and Joshua... But your little ones, who you said would become a prey, I will bring in, and they shall know the land that you have rejected” (Num 14:30-31). In compensation for their unbelief and fear of wandering in the wilderness till their deaths, the Israelites then attempt to take the Land in their own power assuming the Lord would go with them as He promised (at first). Moses finally warns of their destruction in the battle to come and yet they go anyway, to their defeat and downfall. 

I am a strong believer in reading the Word for its originally intended purposes, and in this case that would be to give a historical account of the the early years of God’s chosen people. Yet, I cannot deny that the Word is still alive and active today, piercing and convicting even my sinful heart thousands of years later. I have to confess that even after jumping through whatever “hoops” we must to enter into the calling we have felt God impress upon us, I have this underlying doubt and temptation to think, “why not just forego all He intends and live as ‘normal’?” (my emotioins are easily wooed by the supposed “ease” and comfort that this world has to offer. After the umpteenth time of creating some semblance of “home” and then giving everything away, living strictly off of what can fit in a compact car, driving countless miles to continue mobilizing a support team for the Lord’s plans... I am frankly ready for easy and comfortable.) 

But then God calls me back to that still, quiet place with Him—almost like before the beginning of the world to remind me of the good work He has planned for me to do, even before Creation and my conception (long before my conceivable thoughts of His notions). The Living, Breathing Word of God speaks to me specifically now: “You already know the Promised Land I have for you, don’t doubt me now in face of all that is still to do.” What’s worse, should I carry on with a disbelieving heart, I am doomed to a worser fate of just going on in faith to begin with. As Moses proclaimed the truth of such a condition: “Do not go up, for the Lord is not among you, lest you be struck down before your enemies” (Num 14: 42). 

So though it is hard, so hard, to leave behind fruitful ministries (just barely begun), part with friends who have become like family, time and time again—we must follow the cloud of the Lord’s presence whenever it stays and departs. And the Promises to hold onto are that steadfast Love will continue generation after generation and that God’s fame and glory would be known among the nations. Lord, keep me from the fear that entices me to indulge any thought that leads me astray and potential despair: we’ll never meet our budget, we don’t know what we are doing, we are willfully signing up our child for avoidable hardships, etc. etc. Because You are worth it—and honestly, YOU are the only reason why anyone would ever be so crazy, foolhardy, running as if head over heels into the unknown. 

This year I am going through the classic devotional by Oswald Chambers, “My Utmost for His Highest.” Today’s prescribed reading was especially timely.

The Voice and the Nature of God

“I heard the voice of the Lord, saying: ‘Whom shall I send, and who will go for us?’” (Isaiah 6:8)

The call of God is the expression of God’s nature, not ours. ...It is the threading of God’s voice directly to us over a certain concern... As long as I dwell on my own qualities and traits and think about what I am suited for, I will never hear the call of God. But when God brings me into the right relationship with Himself, I will be in the same condition Isaiah was. Isaiah was so attuned to God, because of the great crisis he had just endured, that the call of God penetrated his soul.

So if you’re reading this update, thanks for partaking in the call with us. As mother and author Kat Lee puts it, “One of the most important reasons we start every day with Jesus is not that it’s something to check off our Christian to-do list. It’s important because God loves His children unfathomably, even more than I love my son, and He’s asking you and me to help reach them. He doesn’t need us to preach from the rooftops. He just wants us to be willing to come before Him each day and ask, ‘Is someone You love lost? How can I help.’” (Hello Mornings, Lee). 

Thank you for loving the lost with us, in this you have already begun to help. Here’s to however long it will take, together and surrendered.

In Him Always,

Magee